Buuuurrrraaaaaahhhhhh !

Annoyed? Irritated? Feel like throwing up on some specific faces? Thoughts of bruised face working as a med at the moment ?

If you find your head swinging North and South, I'll advice a read !

So there are days in this long life where of no where Holy mother of absurdity strike you. No-one yet some one pinch you and push you to the pinnacle of irritation. A faceless person, intrigues your serendipity and rewards you with a feeling of anger, hatred and all those negative words my brain can't prompt of at the moment.

You feel helpless.. Paralytic. Everything surrounding instantly acquires a quintessential ability to kill whatever little that is left within you.  The inaudible banters.. turns into ghostly cries of your nightmares. everything you touch.. SHRED! Nothing falls under your interest. The songs you once played on the highest decibels.. bleed blood out of your ears. The food that instigated fountains in your mouth, now reminded you of the visceral you gained round your belly. The very colors which lifted you up, made you count the thousand shades of skin you own. The books you bought to feed your grey cells now appear a threat to their health. In nutshell, you lose interest. Interest to read, eat, dance, bathe, biological chores , blah, blah and some more blah. examples. You mask a frown on face considering yourself trapped on the darker side of the universe. Sad feelings invade your soul, You imagine yourself drowning in a sea you never want an SOS officer to find.

You don't talk, you sing songs of pain, relate yourself to every misery you have ever heard of. Sit in solitude for long hours and at the end of each patch, decide a redo the task you just completed. Stroke yourself through the better days of life, believing rather swearing that they will never return.

My question to the amalgamation of the above feelings.. is it all really worth the time ?

Really? Are we actually that sad to cry for an entire day without knowing the reason of the sorrow? 

Do we actually not know the cause of the sorrow we are undergoing? 

Seriously? Are we counting ourselves under depressed people? Is this actually Depression? Are we ready for that BIG word?

Answer : A BIG FAT NO !

That ain't any depression.. you ain't going to any rehab for the emotional fracture you are undergoing. you ain't swallowing a list of pills to feel up. you ain't wearing beads on all possible parts of the body. You just ain't swearing anything to yourself for landing into a black pit of life!

This is life and this is going to be this generous on you. You gotta stand and brush down the little demon off your shoulder. Gotta stand up from the situation and welcome new scopes of improvements. Rethinking never helps. Sometimes it is better to let go everything that has happened without registering a space in your brain. Gush in a fresh plush of air and breathe out the heavy(and the stinky) ones. Bruaahh out the melancholy in you. Choose Happiness if you want it.

Life is a gift and you aren't yet entitled to select that gift for yourself. Accept it and rock the bloody Buuurrrah out of it ! :)

There come moments in life when all you require is solitude.
Your mind demands you of it and your respiration dodges if its not met. You take a seat in the darker side of the room, cup your face with your hands.. press your eyes.. trying to stop the pool they've prepared to dab your face with.. and resign.
The most unfortunate memories invade your grey cells, hitting their target.. being as brutal as never and mocks the guilty you house.
All you do is.. hold back.
That anger, that pain, that trauma which eats you within.. degrading your insides., burning your strength, killing the identity you own.
You stand up.. inhaling gusts of air.. faking a confidence.. begging yourself not to cry anymore and whilst this.. brushing out the disobedient tears which deceptively escape from the corner of your eyes.
You walk towards the window.. towards the brighter area of the room.. hoping that it may illuminate the darkness which contains you.. peep out through it.. allowing sun to touch the face that has the blemishes life gave to it..
And after a moment or so you shrink under your skin and crawl back.. Realising the depth of the tragedy you're in.. you resign.. resign again..
this time.. they come back with a force.. an undefeatable force that breaks you.. tear you.. thrash you.
With no one around to hold you.. you fall.. descend to the lowest of yourself and give up!
You cry.. for seconds.. for moments or hours or for an entire day..
lone you.. is abashed by the silence enveloping you..
you feel cheated, betrayed, used and thrown!
Then when your eyes dry out.. you stop..
tired and fatigued you get up.
Realising a bitter lesson you just learned you walk out with a head held high.. as if nothing happened.. you aptly mask your feelings hiding them from the people who gifted you these wrapped in sparkling wrap ups.. tearing your face toflash a smile you move on!

Shared from Google Keep

Resignation.

Lying beneath a platter of stars,
exploring her new grown scars.
Trapped within the expensive clothes,
Resides a person, no one knows.

In a corner,upon a pile of leaves,
Rests a body with stained sleeves.
Something miserable has she under gone,
Or was it misery for what she was born.

A dingy room kept her boxed,
Tethered and tired, her body drops.
Wailing out the sorrow didnt help,
No one ever knew how much she yelped.

Questions were raised, challenging her state.
She stood silent, struggling not to break.
Tears crawled silently from those eyes.
Guilt and shame, spun her tight.

How priceless the things seemed now,
Frightened of the people, sweat drenched her brow.
What made her rent her life to death,
Strangulate her neck, until the last breath.

Lost in a world, she heard their discussion,
Leave her not alone, was some ones suggestion.
Tiredly she faked a curve through her lips.
Im all fine, she said, with a courage of nix.

Her hair flew in wild, entangling around her cheeks.
Her eyes welled up, entailing her grief.
She stood up to walk back,
Weakness plagued her, destiny laid its trap.

How long was she observed by intruging eyes.
Deep within she craved, she could die.
Leaving behind the pain she suffered.
Solitary she needs, she could only mutter.

They came to her, they seemed sympathetic.
Thank you for coming, she sounded apathetic.
She fished a ciggarette, sunk behind the smoke,
An ashened face, a frown it bore.

For once she lived, housed no regrets.
An un restrained person, housed no threat.
Time tossed her down, slammed her hard on the floor,
For now she gives up.. closing all doors.

Get up!

Often one finds himself struggling with the rhetoric "why me?" And mostly digs up more questions than the answers he thought would comfort him. Life is strange, it has a unique pattern engrossed on it.. it picks you up, make you sit right on top of the things you crave.. and then suddenly.. push you from the cliff leaving no time for you to create a shelter, these they call the indespensable ups and downs of life.

But for some category of people life is not a fair dias to stand upon.. they always cuccoon themselves in a misery of worries, in a swamp of complaints and deny every oppurtunity to come out of it. They curse things.. from everything to nothing. If it rains, they'l crib of gettin wet, if its sunny they'l pray for a benevolent cloudy weather and if yet their prayers go unheard they take no time to declare themselves unlucky or more aptly- "severe victims of destiny".

Disasters happen, decisions do go wrong, plans do fail and at times even the back ups disappoints.. as this is life, perhaps the only thing o earth which can not be predicted.
The only thing that can be relied upon is Time!
Time can be better than the gifts your bffs give and can be more severe than a failed love attempt, it can heal the greatest of scars or can give you ones, nothing can repair!

So what if you forgot to slide an umbrella which could have been an escort on that rainy day, it indirectly helped you to enjoy the shower you might have missed! Optimism is the key for satisfaction.

Step out, enjoy the happenings around you, explore as much as this life permits you to.
So what if u fail, failures are stiff proves of the fact that you tried.every failure has a message in it, all whats required is an effort to sit and crack the redacted code it keeps within.

Aint the failed ones more lucky than the ones who failed even to attempt?
More the failure, more would be the compassion to get the target, and more would be the joy after reaching your goal.
Every failed attempt leaves you with a story, collect them, as they are the best motivators for you to march on. Not all clouds bear silver lining, but some.. do.. all it requires is an attempt, an effort to locate one.

With every sunrise allow new rays to luminate your life. Allow them to kindle with you.. permit them to take away the sorrow you house.. cause life is huge.. the un predictable, random events adds to it its essence. Letting it free will certainly open the locked doors, bounding it will certainly lead you to your goal but the path won't be the one you craved for.

For life is beautiful, live every moment of it.

I will not die that early!: I will not die that early:Room smelled of medicin...

I will not die that early!:
I will not die that early:Room smelled of medicin...: I will not die that early: Room smelled of medicines, air felt cold. Time refused to advance, heart denied its pace. Lights were dimm...

me v/s me

me v/s me: Me v/s me Who’s this within me, someone nowhere close to me! Look at her glee, look how she smiles, seems like she has found her l...

You.

I raised my hand up to you,

you weren't there to hold.

I sensed your presence ;

but.. you aren't here I was told.

I hazed around the space,

trying to earn your precious glimpse.

you walked away from me.

on my sight you winced.

I trusted those days,

those minutes, those seconds.

never  thought you could change,

You gave no reminisce.

You descended the stairs,

with a visage having no emotions.

My strength declined,

calculating your each motion.

You saw me fighting;

battling within to hold my tears.

Shattered, I was,

you didn't bother I fear.

I tried to stop you,

you ignored my plea.

you tried to avoid it,

my eyes could see.

love was supposed to stay within us

Insulted, disrespected..

It has now abandoned us.

You smashed out through the door

drifted away from me.

I promise to forget you,

I'll try, my love you're now free.

You meant a world to me.

untouched by false convictions.

tethered by betrayal..

Loneliness..

has now become a painful ramification.

Nights have grown more dark,

Memories wail out hideous pain.

life has come to standstill,

I need you to frame it again.

This life you gave,

once shone golden red;

deprived of your presence..

every night, I lay on a death bed.